Tonight I would like to broach a topic that seems taboo in our society. It is however a topic of not only great importance, but of in my opinion an imperative nature.
The topic is Hobo Names.
Before venturing into this wild and sordid field of research I would like to throw a quick shout out to Mr. John Hodgman, you may know him from such films as Baby Mamma, The Invention of Lying, Coraline and Arthur (NOT the popular PBS children's program). Mr. Hodgman however is probably most well know though for his personification of a PC computer along side Justin Long in the wildly popular Apple "Get a Mac" add campaign.
Mr. Hodgman is the nation's leading expert on the subject of Hobo Names. He devotes a particularly large section of his book 'The Areas of my Expertise' to the subject. So it is that I would like to take a moment to share with you a few of my favorite names from a culture that has fascinated and bewildered mankind since the dawn of time.....
Wicked Paul Fourteen-Toes
Ol' Barb Stab-You-Quick
Twistback John, the Scoliosis Sufferer
Senator Cletus Scoffpossum
Monk, the Monkey Man (which is to say: "the Man")
Cleatus T. Chillingsworth
Foreign Tomas, the Strangetalker
"X," the Anonymous Man or Woman
Irontrousers the Strong
Oooooohhh yeah, the guy is goooooooooood...his work is what inspired me to become a History Teacher.
Also if you enjoyed any of this in the slightest you should check out Mr. Hodgman's 'Five Card Monty' it equals pure hysterics. Unfortunately it is rather difficult to find on the interweb...I'm just one of the lucky people who possess a CD (or compact disk for those of you who don't remember) of Hodgman's audio recordings....I am so blessed...
Why am I plugging John Hodgman so much tonight? This I do not know....perhaps it is because of that highly enjoyable hour and a half of Pink Floyd I experienced earlier tonight (and I use the word EXPERIENCED for a reason, many people don't understand that Pink Flod is an experience, there is a reason the songs are fifteen minutes long....but that is a different subject for a different day...)
...John Hodgman....That is all....Live long and Prosper....